So, we've met just about all of our neighbors, and all of them are super nice. The house directly behind us is a huge three story home that has been hacked into a three family, it's either condos or rental apartments, I'm not sure which. We've met one of the men who lives there on the first floor with his gorgeous golden retriever Max - he's a great guy and we like running into him because he's always friendly. We haven't met the man who lives on the second floor, he seems like a loner type; he doesn't say hello when he sees people, he always has his head down when he walks down the street...he just keeps to himself. Now, the lady that lives on the third floor...boy oh boy does she think she's the cats meow. She's probably in her forties, blond, she's not fat, but I wouldn't categorize her as thin, she's really just thick in the middle, but man, does she have a huge rack.
Why do I know this?
Well, she wears the most inappropriately low cut tops everyday (to work)- and then at night she changes into impossibly short shorts and a tank top to weed the 4 square foot patch of earth in front of the house that has some flowers in it. She doesn't weed like a normal person though, she completely bends at the hips (as if her knees didn't bend) so that she's folded over, ass in air to weed the garden, and while she does this her breasts are nearly falling out of her tank top. Everyday.
Well, Saturday night we decided to try our hand at the grilled pizza, so CB was spending some time in the back yard getting the grill ready (and drinking beers) and I was inside preparing the dough and spinach and shrimp, etc. It took a while for the grill to get ready and then the dough to cook, so CB had been in the back yard alone for some time. When I came outside with the tray full of pizza toppings something caught my eye and for some reason I looked up into the third floor window, where, the neighbor was standing, with just her underwear on, no top, her humongous breasts clearly visible and nearly touching the window screen. It was at this moment that I realized, this show was not intended for me, it was probably for my husband. I was literally frozen in place, and like a ventriloquist talking out of one side of my mouth, I whispered to CB, "oh my God, did you just see that?"
He missed the whole thing, and was then pissed that I didn't alert him to the "tit show in the window." Typical.
From there we just went on and had a lovely night outside...snickering a little through dinner.
5 comments:
Well, you did admit to being a porn-watching exhibitionist in a previous post. Maybe your neighbor felt like she had to compete. ;)
You know, I didn't even think of that. You're probably right. She was probably trying to teach me how "it's done."
So, did you cook the shrimp first? It's beautiful. We may have to try this.
what did you do for the dough and how did everything turn out? recipe!
I used dough that I bought at the market. I would have loved to make my own dough, I just didn't have the time. I worked the dough until it was the size I wanted it to be, and then just put it directly on the grill and let it cook on one side, I then flipped the dough over and put the toppings on the cooked side. I did run into problems here, because I left the dough ont eh grill too long and, well, let's just say the bottom of the pizza was..crispy, or burned, however you want to put it.
AM - I used precooked frozen shrimp that I thawed out prior to making the pizza. If I had time I would have liked to have used raw shrimp and marinated and grilled them first, but I just didn't have the time at this point.
JB
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