I will not lie. I use three, three face creams in the morning and two at night. I do have a bit of fear that the skin on my face will do a free fall at any moment. Like one day I'll wake up and the skin on my face will look as if I've just jumped out of a plane on a skydiving trip...folds of skin whipping back in the breeze...no control over the wrinkles...that my skin will no longer follow the contours of the bone beneath it, but just pulls down down down collecting around my neck...like the skin on a pug dog...that I wear as a new necklace...like chicken waddle. You get the picture.
Yesterday I saw a woman on the train who obviously shared my fear because there is no other way to explain why a perfectly sane woman would get on the train donning a full head of velcro rollers covered by a silk scarf...wearing 1950's cat eye sunglasses, and so much collagen injected into her lips that she had lost the ability to fully close them. Her mouth hanging agape, like that of a cod fish nailed to a board hung on your wall. I have nothing else to say here. It was just a sight.
I got this recipe from my friend Anelise and it was delicious. Enjoy!
Smoked Salmon and farafalle (bow tie pasta) in Lemon Cream Sauce
12 ounces bow tie pasta
1 TB olive oil
2 large, finely chopped shallots
1 cup dry white wine
1/2 cup reduced fat sour cream
1 10-ounce bag of frozen peas
4 ounces of thinly sliced smoked salmon
2 TB fresh lemon juice
1 TB minced tarragon
3/4 tsp. salt
1/4 tsp pepper
Cook the pasta. Drain and reserve 1/4 cup of the liquid
Heat oil in a medium saucepan over medium low heat. Add shallots. Cook for 5 minutes, stirring often. Add wine and simmer for 8 minutes or until reduced to 1/2 cup. Add sour cream and stir with a whisk until smooth. Remove from heat and stir in peas and salmon.
Combine pasta and sauce and reserved cooking water if it is needed. (if the sauce is extra thick for example) Stir in lemon juice and tarragon. Let it stand 3 minutes to absorb the sauce. Season with salt and pepper. Serve. Rating = Damn Good
Did you ever wake up from a dream and say "where in blue fuck did that come from?" I had one of those dreams early this morning. I dreamed I was at a country music concert (point: this would never happen because I hate country music), I don't know who the country singer was, he was male, and he was wearing black jeans and a black cowboy button down shirt, and a tan cowboy hat. He was playing the guitar and singing. I don't remember all the lyrics, but I do remember the part where he got down on one knee, strummin' his guitar and sang this verse to me. "I want to live with you in a state of constant fucking."
WAH?! What psycho part of my subconscious came up with this song? Where do things like this come from. Its at times like this that I believe that our brains do not belong to us when we are asleep. Like the night I had a dream that I had sex with Jason Stackhouse from the the HBO Series True Blood (which, if you have not seen, get the DVD and catch your ass up. Its' so good)
[Small tangent here. The new season of True Blood starts on June 14th and I'm looking for a really kick ass vampire themed martini - you know something red and slightly thick. If you can think of anything please email me - it will make the season premiere that much better with the proper drink. Please note. I loathe tomato juice so no bloody mary's]
Ok. Question. What has been your most whacked out dream? The one where you woke up, shook your head and said. Jumpin Jesus on a pogo stick where did that come from?
Moving right along to the tasty portion of this blog. I made this recipe as a side dish for mother's day and boy o boy were they a hit. Here's what I did.
I took trimmed green asparagus and tossed them in a little olive oil lemon juice and chopped dill. I then roasted them in a 375 degree oven for about 10 minutes, tossing them halfway through.
I then took the white asparagus and trimmed the ends and peeled them. I then blanched them in boiling water for about 4 minutes, threw them in an ice bath and when cool, tossed them with olive oil, lemon juice and dill.
I took presliced smoked salmon and wrapped it around the cool asparagus spears alternating green and white. I finished with fresh dill on the top. Delicious.
Rating = So Damn Good. (and so super easy, and so pretty too. make them for your next get together)
First, I was a little shocked at the outcome of Dancing with the Stars last night.I really thought that Giles (sp?) deserved to win. And he seemed like he really wanted the gody mirror ball trophy too. But, Shawn, she danced like a champion and came away with the goods. I can't believe I watch this show. Last night I thought to myself. I must be getting old, because I'm watching the Dancing with the Stars finale and I haven't even seen one episode of American Idol this year. It must be a sign of my continued aging process.
So, again, no recipe just items in the fridge and pantry thrown together. Here's what I did. I took two heads of broccoli and steamed them for five minutes until they were bright green. When they were cool enough to touch I chopped them up into small pieces (florets and stems) I then grated two carrots on a box grater and added them to the broccoli. In a separate larger bowl I combine two big spoonfuls of low fat mayonnaise, about a tablespoon and a half of whole grain mustard and a few big tablespoons of honey and seasoned with salt and pepper. I then added the broccoli and carrots to the dressing and tossed to coat. I then added a few handfuls of golden raisins and a few handfuls of toasted sunflower seeds and combined those in with the broccoli and carrots. That's it. Too easy right?
A quick and easy summer side.
Rating = Damn Good
I do not know anyone who does not enjoy hot crusty bread. I made a big brunch for mothers day yesterday and really wanted to try and make homemade crusty bread. I Googled "homemade crusty bread" and this recipe came up over and over again. I figured if that many people were posting about it, it had to be good. It took me 24 hours to make this bread, but the actual active time for this recipe is about 10 minutes, the rest is sitting and waiting for the yeast to do it's thing. When the bread came out of the oven I cracked a little piece off to test it. Oh, Mama was it good; crunchy on the outside and warm and soft on the inside. It had an almost sour dough consistency on the inside. I cracked off a hunk for CB, who grabbed some butter and slathered in on the warm bread. About 30 seconds later I hear this "Damn, Jules, this bread is good, this bread is better than Federal Hill bread, it's better than all the breads I grew up with" then this, through a mouth full of warm buttered bread "you're gonna have to make this again."
It was indeed that good.
I started thinking about all the things I could add to it, rosemary and sea salt, caraway seeds, whole wheat flour. It was at this point that CB said. "No, do not mess with bread, all this bread will ever need is butter."
I'm still going to try and play with the recipe a little. But here is the original recipe that I worked from. Try if for yourself, it's that good. Crusty Bread LINK HERE
Rating = So God Damn Good
This recipe was a complete pantry have at it. I didn't want to go to the grocery store, and CB didn't want another tuna melt so I took everything I had on hand and threw it into this dish. It was awesome. Here is what I did.
I took a pound of raw peeled shrimp and marinated it in a mixture of olive oil and canola oil with the zest and juice of a big lime and a big handful of chopped cilantro. I let the shrimp marinate in that for about 20 minutes and then I grilled them on high heat on both sides until just starting to curl.
For the couscous I used Israeli couscous from Trader Joe's and prepared it according to the package. While the couscous was cooking I diced up a green pepper, orange pepper, and half a red onion. In a separate bowl I combine a little canola oil, salt and pepper, the juice and zest from another lime and a big handful of chopped cilantro. When the couscous was done I combined everything together, the chopped veggies, couscous and shrimp and poured the oil/cilantro mixture over the top and tossed to combine. It was AWESOME! This is my new favorite BBQ side dish - move over pasta salad this one's a keeper.
And - on another note. I was shocked, shocked that Lil' Kim was kicked off of Dancing with the Stars last night, but CB is happy because he hated watching her dance because she makes funny faces with her mouth. At least now I don't have to hear him yell..."Ugh, your damn mouth" every time we watch the show.
Happy Belated Cinco de Mayo Bitches. I've got a great guacamole recipe I'll be making for y'all this weekend. Sorry, my timings a bit off, you know, with being a slave to the man everyday at work.
Rating = So Damn Good (aka, make it and put it in yo pie hole)
